If Children Experienced A Disappointment, Help Him Survive
Many things can make children disappointed. For example, disappointed because it rained in the middle of playing football, or disappointed because it did not go on vacation because you have a sudden job at the office, even disappointed because the child's favorite ice cream that you want to buy turns out. Actually, the feeling of disappointment or disappointment felt by young children is very reasonable and not something that should always be avoided by children.
Robert Brooks, Ph.D., author of the book Raising Resilient Children, revealed that, if parents always protect their children from disappointment, indirectly parents have prevented children from developing some important skills in life.
However, that does not mean you take your hands off when children are feeling disappointed. Instead, it immediately helps children to deal with disappointment in the right way.
Well, the disappointment felt by children can bring certain impacts, such as tantrums.
What Should Parents Do When Small Problems Make Children Very Tantrums?
Teach children about what can and cannot be changed.
Children may not understand that something is out of control. Therefore as a parent must try to explain to children about things out of control. Discuss immediately with your child about what makes children tantrums.
Introduce children to a variety of activities to find the one they like the most
It is best to introduce children to various activities until they find the activity they like the most. The goal is that when the child is a tantrum, you can invite the child to do the activity so that the tantrum gradually disappears.
Avoid punishing your child for tantrums
It is better to avoid punishing children only because of tantrum children. Especially if the child is easy to cry or fuss.
What Should Parents Do When Children Get Sulky?
Sulking may not be classified as a tantrum, but many say that sulking is a behavior that is almost close to a tantrum. Well, if a child sulks when disappointed in something, what should you do?
Give children a choice
Instead of getting angry when a child sulks with disappointment, you can give him a choice. For example when one day you and your family fail on vacation because of uncertain weather, give him options such as: "We really can't camp, but do you want to vacation at home by putting up a tent (teepee tent)?", Or "Would you like to go camping next week when it's sunny? "
Encourage children to do other activities, such as helping someone
To reduce children's sulking, then you can distract them by doing other activities such as helping you do something. For example, helping you tidy up the dining table and so on.
Help the child solve his own problems
Instead of scolding a child for sulking, you should help the child solve his own problems. The easiest way is to ask them, "What do you want to do so you don't feel annoyed anymore?"
How to Introduce Children to Disappointment
Avoid Saying Certain Things When Children Are Disappointed
It is important for you not to say certain things when children are disappointed. The goal is that children begin to recognize feelings of disappointment or disappointment.
You Like Babies (Little Children)
When children feel disappointed, you should avoid saying that he was like a child or as a baby. Instead, say, "It doesn't matter if you feel disappointed or sad, next time we do something else so that you are not disappointed or sad."
Come on, do this
It is better to avoid giving direct ideas to do certain things when children are disappointed. Instead, ask them "Do you have other ideas we can do together?"
The goal is that children can learn to find solutions to help them feel better. And, not just giving children a solution so that he feels better.
These Small Things Don't Need To Be Exaggerated
It's best to avoid saying that something doesn't need to be exaggerated or saying "That doesn't need to make you disappointed." That way you will not add disappointment to him. It is better to say, "I know that this is difficult for you."
How to Help Children Grow More Tolerant:
Empathize with child disappointment
You need to empathize with the disappointments of children. The goal is that children do not feel alone when feeling disappointed and it is natural. Explain to children that everyone has felt disappointed. Tell about experiences when children feel disappointed at certain things.
Create a network of other people in children's lives
Children need to grow up in a social environment that does not only contain you and your partner. The goal is that children can learn to tolerate something like others do in his life.
Use children's mistakes as valuable lessons
Early childhood needs to learn and realize that what they are doing is wrong. However, you should not immediately point out that he is wrong. Ask a few questions that help him find out that what was done before was wrong.
Disappointment can be experienced by children even at an early age. Our job as parents is to try to help them escape from the disappointment in the right way. That is, we do not need to always protect children from feeling disappointed so that children become more responsible individuals when they grow up. It is better to help children deal with these disappointments in a good way.
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